"Hon, I'm going to the store. Do you need anything?"
I jumped at the chance. "Yes! I'm out of Vitamin Water Zero. Can you pick me up a few bottles?"
My husband thought for a minute. "Which aisle is it on?"
I told him where and added, "Really, it can be any sports drink, as long as it is minimal calories."
"OK," he replied. "Be back in a little bit."
He called from the store. "I found it. What flavor do you want?"
I was glad it hadn't been a problem. "It doesn't matter what flavor, as long as it is minimal calories. Thanks!"
He got home and told me he'd already put them in the refrigerator. What a good man!
The next morning, on my way out the door, I grabbed one for my workout. My eyes swung back for a second look when I saw the label. There was no Zero in the title. It was just Vitamin Water.
My husband stood nearby fixing his juice. "Oh, you found them. I'm glad I was able to get them for you." He saw the look on my face. "What's wrong?"
"Oh, uh, nothing really," I fumbled out. "They didn't have Vitamin Water Zero?"
"Zero? I just remember you saying minimal calories. That's what this has," he explained.
I showed him the calorie count on the bottle. "Look, honey. It's 100 calories per serving, and it's two servings per bottle."
"Right," he said. "Minimal calories, just like you wanted."
"No, honey, by minimal calories, I meant like ten, or twenty at the most," I explained. "Two hundred calories is pretty substantial for what I've allotted myself for the morning."
He thought for a minute. "Well, to me, 100 calories per serving is pretty minimal. Substantial calories would be like a thousand."
I laughed. "Ah, no problem. I love you anyway." I kissed him on my way out as I mentally made plans to add in another mile to my run, which would take care of the extra 100 calories. He's still a good man, even though our differing opinions on minimal calories will probably never get resolved.
What about you- what differences in thoughts and communication styles have you noticed between men and women?
The homonym from lion-speak, "men I maul"
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, I wrote that just now for lil ole you-bee.
Oh, I just noticed that 100 has TWO zeros in it, so he did doubly weLL.
DeleteI always, always love a good homonym. Made my morning!
DeleteESB: As long as I don't have to consume the extra calories that zero represents-
DeleteDearest Shelly,
ReplyDeleteFrankly, this story is VERY familiar to us. And gave me a smile of consent. I rarely ask my husband to buy something for me because I know he is always reluctant to do. If it happens, maybe a couple of times a year. And he always needs help for the clerk, haha. Like you did, I ask him to call me to make sure what I asked for.
My husband sometimes watches Diet proceedings and tries to talk with me failing the attempt, haha.
Well, we have an old saying "mochi ha mochi-ya" which means "it is better to make rice-cakes for a its maker". Probably, similar to "Every man to his trade". Oh, as long as he listens to me for the serious matters.
Well, I can't help add that we know you must be careful for what you take as you amazingly succeeded to reduce weight. He might as well... :)))
Sending you lots of love and hugs from Japan, xoxo Miyako*
Orchid: I really like that saying, and it so fits! And, my dear friend Miyako, I think men and women and communication styles are the same the world over. It's good to know we're not alone in that boat! Have a wonderful day with love and hugs from here!
DeleteWith me it's like planning a meal at a restaurant for the two of us and before you know it she has invited two other relatives. She loves to complicate my life on a regular basis.
ReplyDeleteI feel for your husband.
Odis: Ha! It's good to hear from a man's point of view!
DeleteToo cute!! I like his way of thinking that 100 calories per serving is minimal!
ReplyDeletehave a great day Shelly!
betty
Betty: there is a huge gap in food about what men think is minimal an what we do...
Delete<< What about you- what differences in thoughts and communication styles have you noticed between men and women? >>
ReplyDeleteGood one, Shelly! (LOL) Yes, old Shady is a veteran of the war between Mars and Venus. I continue to amaze myself how often I get it wrong with members of the opposite sex, including Mrs. Shady. In your husband's defense, however, he had no way of knowing precisely what you meant by "minimal calories" unless you gave him a number to work with. In your defense he should have elicited additional information from you while he had you on the phone and before he made the purchase. The lesson to be learned is the one taught in NLP: The meaning of your communication is the response that you get. "Throw the horse over the fence... some hay." Communication clears up when we remember to ask each other "what specifically?" Have a wonderful Thursday, dear friend Shelly!
Shady: you are oh, soo correct. I have learned I must be ver specific or face the consequences. Have a wonderful day in sunny Florida!
DeleteThis made me smile 'cause it sounds so familiar. (I like the logic that 100 has two zeros.)
ReplyDeleteNonnie: That made me laugh, too!
DeleteOh what a funny post Shelly, I'm laughing here! Sounds very typical and familiar! Just like Shady says, I've learned to be very specific in my instructions...but in your defense you did ask for Vitamin water ZERO ...Your loving husband made it more complicated that it needed to be.
ReplyDeleteSaid I: next time I will text him a picture of it so there can be no questions!
DeleteMy wife describes portions differently for her than she does for me: I get a bowl of ice cream whereas she gets a few spoonfuls. Both amounts are always the same. I get a sandwich whereas she gets a piece of toast. Of course heaped up on her "piece of toast" are all of the ingredients in my sandwich.
ReplyDeleteStephen: This had me rolling! It is so very typical of the differences in communication styles-
DeleteLoved this post, Shelly! And I'm still smiling at your husband's different interpretation of "minimal calories". How gracious of you to thank him anyway and then run an extra mile to burn off those extra calories! It's one of many signs that, despite the Mars and Venus stuff we all experience, your relationship is built to last and thrive!
ReplyDeleteDr. Kathy: especially when it comes to food, there are vast disconnects in communication between the axes. It is really funny to me how we see the same thing so differently!
DeleteMy husband is actually a rare commodity in that we're pretty much in sync most of the time. He asks questions when he isn't sure. The one thing where we really differ is how we grocery shop. He walks along and picks up things randomly, figuring out what to do with them later. I go with a specific list of things I will need for the meals I've already planned out for the week. He looks at prices on EVERYTHING. I look at prices on NOTHING. Other than that, we're in harmony.
ReplyDeleteKaren: it is good to have one who thinks of prices. Too often I don't, much anyway, and it's a good thing to have someone who is keeping an eye on it while we have our fun-
DeleteThat sounds like something that might happen at my house. Lately, we check and double check to avoid this stuff, because it tends to happen a lot!
ReplyDeleteLydia: Especially when excess calories are involved, I really have to pay attention!
DeleteWhen I was married, my husband, on the rare occasions that he went to the store to get anything I requested nearly always came back with something totally different! I never understood it apart from realising that he just didn't listen to a word I said lol. At least yours listened to part of what you said which is amazing! :)
ReplyDeleteLyndylou: Ha! Yes, I am thankful he at least got the Vitamin Water part right-
DeleteI had to learn patience this winter when I became completely home-bound for Spencer's sake. Matt did all of our shopping on the way home from work. I would send him a list and then wonder what if any of my list would actually make it into the cart. I never thought I would miss grocery shopping, but I was all too glad to take over again in the spring.
ReplyDeleteNancy: I've always thought it would be very interesting to track what a man thinks when he's shopping and what a woman thinks and then compare the two. Probably couldn't be more different!
DeleteShelly, thank you for sharing. Also for your encouragement to me on my blog. Blessings.
ReplyDeleteGrace: It's so good to see you back! I'm glad you're feeling better.
DeleteDid you hear me and my husband have this conversation? like the exact same one. really funny! And then I felt like I couldn't yell at him because he got what i told him...now we write exact, specific instructions...if he gets the courage to go again! but he never wants to go..he pleads..Ill do anything else!
ReplyDeleteAnnmarie: I'm glad I'm not the only one who just assumed both parts of the couple think exactly alike!
DeleteWhat differences have I noticed? Hmmm. May I co-opt your blog for about a month?
ReplyDeletevanilla: OK- I laughed really loudly at your comment!
DeleteDear Shelly, I've never been married to a man and so really I have little experience of the way men think differently from others. I do have a few male friends--married to my female friends--and the thing I notice most is the great delight they take in hardware stores and their wares and in the intricacies of technology. Peace.
ReplyDeleteDee: Oh, that is so true! We spent a few hours in a tractor supply store the other day because my husband was carefully and devotedly looking at different pieces of equipment. My daughter and I went through the very small section they had of farmer girl clothes several times and had even branched out into perusing the animal feed section a few times before he was finished~
DeleteOh my goodness great topic - you know men are from mars and women are from Venus don't you? sandie
ReplyDeleteSandie: I'd even put them from different universes!
DeleteAt least he tried unlike some men I know who would say they will look for it and then forget and say couldn't find it anywhere they must have been sold out........yes I am talking about my hubby here.......lol
ReplyDeleteJo-Anne: Ha! That was funny~
DeleteAnd thank you for stopping by. I believe I am going to be wrapping up my blog soon, and it's been a joy to get to know you here. And yes, we have to be very careful when we send our hubbies to the store for us~
Ha! Yes, I've learned specificity is best. Same with my kids. It's amazing how much we have to walk people through this stuff!
ReplyDeleteTheresa: Sometimes I assume my mind and thoughts are much more transparent that they actually are~
DeleteAren't men funny? My husband does stuff like that all the time. You should go watch this video. You will find your not alone. In fact just watch all her stuff you'll be rolling. She calls her husband left brain :)
ReplyDeletehttp://youtu.be/-YFRUSTiFUs
Craziness: That's hilarious! It's really incredible how different men's and women's brains are, and yet we still co-exist! Thanks for pointing me in her direction~
DeleteThis is so funny and so true!!! Thanks for the laugh tonite!
ReplyDeleteJamie: I don't think communication between men and women is ever going to be on the same wavelength~
DeleteMy husband believes that the way to start any day is with a cream cheese danish.
ReplyDelete:-)
Pearl
Pearl: And the cream cheese danish would be minimal calories, too~
DeleteShelly - What a fun post!
ReplyDeleteMarsha: Thank you!
Delete